Meet the Family!

Once Candy and I made contact, the word was out! By the end of the day, I had spoken to my niece Denyal, my half-sister Robin and my half-siblings' father, Bob. Candy insisted he was my father as well, but that was obviously not the case. In addition to the three half-sisters and one half-brother I knew about, I found out that I had another half-sister (who also has a different father). I also discovered that my birthmother was a twin and that her name was Darlene (her twin sister Arlene was the woman I had just missed meeting in the San Fernando Valley years earlier). I would have spoken with my birthmother on that day too had Candy not immediately called her and proceeded to tell her off for not letting her and my other half-siblings know that I existed. Unfortunately, as a result of that phone call my birthmother refused any contact with me. This was not at all how I had envisioned the beginning of our relationship.


During the numerous phone conversations, I discovered that three of my four sisters had drug addictions. Two had been in and out of jail and often lost contact with the rest of the family. One of my sisters had been a nude model until she lost a leg in an automobile accident, ending her career and kickstarting a heroin addiction. As a result, she had been on methadone for nearly thirty years. My niece kept in contact with my brother periodically, but had recently lost touch with him as well. My birthmother also suffered from a drug addiction and often lived on the streets of Lake Elsinore.

As you can imagine, this was a lot to take in. At first glace, it didn't appear I had much in common with any of my birthfamily. Luckily, my niece and I  had an instant connection. She had a great job, was recently married and had two stepchildren. We agreed to get together in a couple of weeks and spoke on the phone frequently until our first meeting.


I was more nervous that I ever remember being, before or since. We decided to meet at my niece's house in Wildomar and then go to lunch. I instantly felt comfortable with Denyal and her husband Brian. With them it came easilty. It was as if we had known each other forever. My sister was late getting there and once she arrived with my nephew's daughter Bella we went to lunch. During that time, Bella's mother Katie called to ask how it was going. She asked my niece if I was weird, to which she promptly responded, "No, she's totally normal." It was a pretty quiet lunch with a lot of eating and very little small talk. My sister Robin did make one comment that shocked me. She said she didn't expect me to be such a "Miss Priss". I was completely taken aback. Interesting, especially considering it was almost summer and I was wearing a sundress (it's hot in Elsinore). Anyone who knows me, knows that I'm not the "prissy" type.  Anyhow, all in all it was a good day.


So I know what you're thinking ... what about my birthfather?


When Candy made that first phone call, she asked Darlene why she never told her dad (Bob) he had another daughter. Darlene responded that he was not my father. My father was Bruno. When Denyal spoke with Janice (my oldest half-sister) to tell her about me, she was not surprised. She remembered me (Nancy) and said my dad was Bruno. She was ten when I was born.

All I knew from my birth certificate information on the California birth index was my birthfather's first name started with a B. I had searched and searched and found someone about the right age named Bruno, but now I knew for sure. It was Bruno!